Woohoo! Down 3.2 pounds! Although, more than likely I'm not down quite that much in one week. Last week I didn't technically weigh-in. I weighed-in on New Year's Eve at 153.1, and realistically I was most likely around the 153.something range on my actual weigh-in day last week. However, because I drank quite a bit on New Years and I had a mini-pig-out-session (nothing major) on Tuesday, I simply assumed that I had gained a little bit of weight - so I decided to say 155 just to be safe. If I had to take a stab in the dark, I'd say my real weight last week was 153.5 or so, giving me a 1.5 pound loss last week and a 1.7 pound loss this week. Either way, I'm 151.8 today, and that feels awesome!

I'm only 1.9 pounds away from a huge milestone. Seeing my weight in the 140s is something I've thought about for a long, long time. I briefly got down into the 140s during my first real success in weight-loss, back in September-December 2010. On New Year's Eve 2011 I was at my lowest adult weight ever, roughly 148/149 pounds. My moment of glory was incredibly brief, and before I knew it I was back into the 150s, soon to climb into the 160s, then the 170s, and finally landing back into the 180s by the following New Year (2012). This New Years I was in the low 150s, and next New Years I will be in the 120s!

It's kind of freaky to me, actually, to think that I could potentially reach this milestone NEXT WEEK!? I'm not anticipating that I will, 1.9 pounds is a pretty lofty goal, but at the same time, it's not completely out of the realm of possibility. In seven short days I could be walking around weighing in the 140s! That's a crazy, crazy thought. It's been over a year since I've felt that satisfaction, and I only felt it for a moment. If I'm this excited about the 140s, I don't even want to think about what I'll be like when I'm teetering the 130s! I'll be a BASKET CASE, hahaa.

Oh, and I got yet another badge! Yay me:

I've been doing a lot of thinking about weight loss lately. I mean, let's be fair, I think about it almost constantly, but lately I've been doing a lot more thinking about how people lose weight. Looking back on my weight loss journey, I have tried a lot of different methods. The two that stick out the most are Medifast and Weight Watchers. This post is probably going to sound like a bash against Medifast and a plug for Weight Watchers, but that's NOT what I'm intending. Just trying to get some thoughts down.

When I started doing Medifast back in 2010, it was like an answer to my prayers. I had tried to lose weight for so long, and now I finally found something that was working, and it was working fast. In three months I was down just shy of 30 pounds and I felt better than I ever had in my life. But as much as I loved Medifast (the results that is) ... I HATED it at the same time. I hated eating out of packets. I hated having to miss out on special events. I hated the food, towards the end that is - I just got sick of eating the same stuff over and over and over. And the irony of the whole thing is that after every stint with Medifast I always regained the weight. I tried three times. The first time I lost 30 pounds. I got cocky and thought I could do it on my own, and gained the 30 pounds back. The second time I only lost 15 pounds before I got sick of the food, and shortly after I was back up again. Then the third time, I lost 25 pounds, and although I only gained 5 of those pounds back, still - I gained back.

I'm not saying that now that I'm doing Weight Watchers I will never gain the weight back, but I think the reason I gained all the weight back before is because Medifast didn't teach me anything. The thing is, I don't really have to learn anything. I know how to eat. I've read so many meal plans and nutrition journals and food blogs that I could probably publish a best-seller on how to eat right. So it's not really that Medifast didn't teach me anything ... Medifast never made me use my knowledge. I was eating what they were telling me to eat. I was eating five of their little packets, and one meal of a limited meat and vegetable. Of COURSE I got sick of their food. I was eating the same things, over and over again. It was so hard for me to go out to eat with friends - I couldn't have bread, or dairy, or FRUIT. I couldn't even have a glass of wine with dinner. I couldn't do anything! Yes, it worked. But it was so restricting, so tedious, and so not right for me. I tried it three times, and I failed three times.

Now, on Weight Watchers, I don't see myself failing. I may slip up here and there, and I have, and I will again. I'm human. It happens. But the difference this time is I don't feel deprived. On any normal day I don't feel like I'm on a diet. Sure, there are times I have to stop myself from doing something - like if someone at work brings in donuts, or if a friend suggests we go get pizza instead of going to a restaurant with more options. But, even if I decide to have that cake, or go for that pizza, it's not the end of the world.

I can't tell you how many times on Medifast I went to a party or a BBQ or a social event of any kind and I couldn't eat or drink anything because NOTHING was on their limited plan. I can't tell you how many times I was invited to brunch, or to a benefit, or to some other function and I simply didn't go because I knew there would be nothing for me to eat. That's not living. Sure, the weight came off, but it went right back on! Because I was FINALLY able to eat the things I wanted it eat. Finally I was able to go to those events and indulge, and because it had been so long since I'd indulged, I over-indulged. And boom. Back to 185 pounds.

I'm really confident that this time things are different. Yes, the weight is coming off slower, but it's coming off! I'm down 10.4 pounds! And I'm eating food that will stick with me forever! Turkey, low fat cheese, yogurt, whole grains, fruit, vegetables, sensible portions of desserts. I'm really engraving the concept of balance and moderation. I'm molding the way I used to eat into a way of eating that will help me maintain my weight forever. I really do believe that. I really do believe this time is different. Yes, it's hard. Yes, it's slow. And yes, I just want it to be over - but you know what? It will be. Before I even know it. One day I'll wake up, look in the mirror, and not even recognize myself. And I'm getting there... one pound at a time!

I have been a fan of Walden Farms products for quite a while, ever since I started my first round of Medifast back in September 2010. The very idea of condiments with no calories, no fat, no carbs, no gluten, no sugars, no ... anything basically ... has always been incredible to me. Over the years I've sampled several products of theirs, including their peanut butter, mayonnaise, chocolate syrup, but have taken heavy advantage of their salad dressings and pancake syrup in particular. Recently I decided I wanted to sample a few of their other products, so I made a rather large order. I decided the first to sample would be their caramel dip. I've been eating a lot of apples recently, and the other day I had an amazing idea! What if I took my 0-point apples and dipped them into delicious caramel dip, but not just any caramel dip, 0-point caramel dip!

I was slightly skeptical before dipping my fruit into the jar. Although I am quite a fan of a good handful of their products, others I've tasted have been somewhat questionable, and the idea that they could take all of the calories, fat, carbs, etc. out of something as sweet as caramel made me a little nervous about the taste-test results. This was either going to be amazing - the best thing I've ever tasted - or horrendous - a terrible, awful mistake. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and lowered my apple slice into the creamy mixture below. It looked like caramel dip. It smelled like caramel dip. And - as surprising as it was - it TASTED like caramel dip! Delicious, sweet, wonderful caramel dip!

• Each serving contains zero calories, zero fat, zero carbs, and zero sugars - meaning zero points!
• Each serving is gluten-free, allowing this dip to fit into any food lifestyle.
• This dip does not contain any artificial flavorings or colorings - all natural!
• The jar does not need to be refrigerated until after it is opened, allowing you to stock up!
• It's completely delicious, and can doctor up a wide-variety of foods.

I think it's all too obvious that my goals for December did not work out exactly as planned. I didn't try any new recipes, let alone one a week. I definitely did not work out four times a week; in fact, the last couple weeks I haven't worked out at all, aside from when I went to Pilates last Wednesday. And I did not reach the 140s by New Year's Eve. Looking back I know it was a bit cocky of me to throw out goals during one of the most difficult weight-loss months in the year. But, you live and learn. Time to move forward and hopefully set some goals I can stick with. So, here goes!

Now, I have to be honest about something. I didn't weigh-in this week, and actually this post is being written on Thursday, January 3, NOT Wednesday, January 2. Essentially I'm adding in this entry for the pure sake of consistency. Why did I choose to keep my weigh-in at 155? On Monday, I weighed-in at 153.1, so what made me choose to up my weight rather than simply use 153.1 as my official weigh-in number?

The plain and simple reason is that I'm pretty sure I gained a little bit of weight in the last few days. My friend was in from Michigan and even though I had a plan it was very difficult to stick with and it simply fell through the cracks. I didn't track any food Monday through Wednesday and spent very little time worrying about it. Although my friend was actually the one who was on vacation, I was very much living a vacation lifestyle for a few days. We spent the majority of time away from my apartment, so cooking wasn't an option. To be honest, I expected to pig out with her every single night, and we only really did once - so I consider the "trip" a success. At the end of the day I don't have any regrets, and I think it's because these last couple of days tied into the "special event" category I talked about in my last post. Looking back, if given another chance, I know I wouldn't have done anything differently.

Back to the weigh-in. Even though I don't know for sure I'm back at 155, I'm comfortable with that number as a pretty safe assumption. If next week I have a massive drop then I'll know I was a bit off, but I think I'm close enough in the ball park that next week will throw out a typical number. I don't really have anything else to say as I'm not really sure where I'm at, but I'm confident going into this week and I know that now that the distractions of the holidays are done and over with I can get back to being focused and start inching my way to goal!